A trust can be used to fulfill many wishes. They are not just for the wealthy. They are much more common than you may realize, but its one of those things people never talk about. Here are some common reasons anyone might want a trust.

I often hear clients say, “I don’t want the State to take all my money.” As a point of fact, the State does not take your money, they simply require you to pay for your care until you qualify for them to pay for this care. This is called spending down your assets. Rest assured however, that there are means to protect your hard-earned assets for your spouse and your family if you follow their rules.

When my grandmother’s dementia progressed, my relationship to her changed. I had been her loving grandchild, who she watched grow. She taught me to sew, make coconut bunny shaped cakes at Easter, and took me on a teddy bear picnic with her best friend Gloria once. Soon I became a beloved person whose name she couldn’t quite recall. In the end I was just a friendly visitor. We were lucky that she never lost her kind personality. She would say thank you for visiting and ask how I was. She never stopped trying to make me better. Her last words to me were “work hard!” Then she turned to my Dad and said “you, don’t work so hard.”

Don’t let the title of Elder Planning fool you. Everyone eighteen or older should have a power of attorney, a living will for health care decisions, and maybe a will. Why? Because anyone and everyone could have a car accident, or medical event, such as a stroke, and without a power of attorney or living will, your family will not have the ability to make decisions for you. But if you ever were to end up in a hospital with a medical emergency, you will want a family member or other trust person to make those critical health care decisions while alive, and in the event of death, to handle your assets and transfer them to the people you want. As a Navy JAG lawyer for many years, our command authority required every sailor from the lowest ensign to admiral to have those critical documents in place. Why? Because if the need arose to make legal or health care decisions for any sailor who was temporarily or permanently incapacitated, the Navy did not want to be stuck with any time consuming delays. Put in Boy Scout terms, be prepared.

Much of my time is spent encouraging families to plan ahead. This often means creating a Power of Attorney, Living Will, Last Will, and sometimes a trust. Usually, the spouse is named as the person who will assist, with one or more of the children as a backup in case both spouses become incapable, in need of long term care or pass away. In the best circumstances these documents are critical to ensure assets are protected and any life transitions are as smooth as possible. The trouble is getting started.

“Help please!” my daughter asks. It sounds more like “Hep Peas”, but it is always stated without pride or frustration. “Hep Peas,” as a fact. It could be help putting on her shoes, reaching for a snack, opening the toothpaste or refilling her water. “Hep Peas, Mama.” So I help, grateful she knows her limits. Grateful she still needs me. I also love “Hand,” when she insists we hold hands either to go down stairs, or cross a road, or fall asleep. “Hand,” she insists, and I wonder if it’s more for me than her sometimes.