Everyone in Connecticut knows the old saying that autumn leaves must fall and indeed that is what we are experiencing right now. A staff member at Allaire Elder Law came up with the bright idea of comparing the changes of color on leaves to the changes in life as we age. When we are young and full of energy, we are like those green leaves of summer. But as the decades go by and people move into their 60’s, 70’s, 80’s or older, that aging body starts to lose some muscle mass, coordination, and increases muscle and other pains to let us know we are not young anymore. That’s natural, and fine as it goes, until physical or mental declines reach the point where the activities of daily living (ADLs) become difficult to do. Those are bathing, dressing, feeding and toileting yourself, and transferring into or out of a bed or a chair. Risks to safety awareness can also arise. When one or more of those activities of daily living (ADLs) start to decline, it is the body’s sign that the autumn of life has arrived. Fortunately for us humans, that is usually a multiyear process, and we need to modify our daily activities to account for the physical and mental decline.

At some point in every adult’s life, whether birthdays or health problems or family changes such as birth of a child or parents needing care makes us think about what happens to our assets and our families’ well-being when those changes occur. Here are some thoughts derived from years of experience.

When a parent suffers a stroke or other acute illness, the family is suddenly faced with difficult and costly decisions about where to get care and how to pay for it. There is also another matter of great concern, and that is who is legally liable to pay for very expensive long term care, either at home or in a nursing home.

Sooner or later every generation faces the minor or major issues, involving safety, care, and living arrangements as parents age. Physical ability, mental acuity and increasing dependency on help from others are the issues that have to be addressed. Let’s look at a typical aging couple and in this example assume the husband is developing a degree of dementia and decline in motor skills.

The family home is not only where years of precious memories reside, and for many people it is their most valuable asset. It’s natural for parents to want to pass on that home, or its value, to their children or grandchildren. In most cases, that can be done with appropriate planning at the appropriate age, which is when people get up in years and have an increased risk of long term care. The following information outlines what the rules are and how they can protect that home, and other assets as well.

A recent letter to us from a Connecticut resident asked how to find a caring, responsible advocate to provide for her well-being in the later stages of life. A significant part of the answer is to retain a law firm that is part of the national Life Care Planning Law Firms Association. That is comprised of law firms dedicated to a holistic elder law practice “that offer legal resources to help elderly clients and their families respond to the challenges of aging, long term illness and disability. That kind of law firm has elder care coordinators (usually social workers) and lawyers and paralegals who know the Medicaid rules and Veteran Administration rules for homecare in Connecticut. The goal of the Life Care Planning Law Firm is first and foremost to do the planning and documents necessary to keep the elder person in the best living situation in the community, and not in a nursing home.